Your 20s

If anyone told you that life gets easier as you age, I must have not listened to what age that is because my 20s are kicking my butt.

It’s crazy to me that at 23 years old, I am still trying to find myself. A month before graduating undergraduate school, I always thought that my job is solely what I am going to be doing for another 20 years.

It has been less than a year since graduating and my whole mentality has changed on a career. I just switched agencies after being at my first one for only seven months. Yes, it was great that I was working in my dream city, my boss wasn’t in the office all the time so I felt independent and I was thrown right into pitching top tier media but I became insecure. I wasn’t securing placements and I felt as if I sucked at my job. I tried to tell myself that I am so young and just starting out but I didn’t want to use that excuse. I didn’t want to feel like an intern because I wasn’t. Yes, I was in an entry-level role but I didn’t always want to be stuck in that role. I wanted to do bigger things that I was capable of.

Now it is March 17th 2020. I’ve been at my new agency working in the food and beverage sector and representing restaurants for a month now (anyone that knows me understands that this is the sector I am meant for).  I am so happy with the change especially since I am securing placements in top outlets like Thrillist and Eater. However, I am still not content.

Before 2019 ended, I was in a dark place. I was so angry and miserable with my situation. I didn’t have a passion for my job and I felt repeatedly beaten down from all the weight I carry. Therefore, I decided to write a little; I titled it “Six Months later”. I reflected how crazy life has been since graduating college.

Like I said, I am not fully content with my life and I am not sure if that is my perfectionist quirk or I am just a brat. If I am being honest, I love public relations especially in the field I am in right now since I OBSSESS over food however am I meant for more marketing? I just re-found my love for writing – was I meant to be a journalist like I always dreamed of being when I was growing up?

All I know is that everything is meant for a reason. That is why when people ask you “What do you see doing in five years” or  “What is your plan in the next five years” is the most pointless question. No one knows. You can’t possibly predict that.

I always said I’d be living in NYC and here I am living in New Jersey… and I’m from Connecticut…

Published by Ariana Lena

Renewing my passion for writing & finally putting my journalism degree to work.

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